“Wood-burning fireplaces to be made illegal from September 1, 2008 in Southern California”. Finally!, I thought, as I heard this newsline from KTLA early this morning. As you probably have noticed from the photos of my apartment, I have a fireplace. It just sits there with a small flame flickering on one side of the gas-chamber on which wood is to be loaded.
The reason I feel it is a good move long time in the coming is that I got mixed messages as to the green intentions of this country. I enter a Raplhs and there is a pile of wood pieces and a Recycle-your-plastic-bags bin facing each other, like two rodeos in a wild wild west movie, contesting for the customer’s favour….no, no, you stupid American MS Word dictionary, I will not delete that ‘u’ from favour…it sounds spanish then. Anyways, so that would make me wonder if Californians were that green after all.
I am generally green. Deepak is more mauve. For all my straight guy friends, mauve is like pale lavender. For all my straight guy friends, lavender is like light violet. For all my straight guy friends, violet is a mix of blue and red leaning towards blue.
Why Deepak is mauve is that he is almost always anti-green. He is the normal one here. If he was totally anti-green, he would be lavender. Lavender is the opposite of green. Check out any negative. There were times during winter, when Deepak would look longingly at the wood pieces hoping I would say Yes to getting a crackling fire started in our new home. But the Yes never came and now it is going to be illegal too. I am sure he imagines lighting the fire and watching TV with a glass of wine in his one hand and the remote in the other. Yeah right!
So now while you cluck-cluck at how I oppress my poor husband, I am thinking of new uses for the fireplace. It would have made a fantastic puja place as the diya will always be lit. It is the only exhaust in my house. Another use could be to clear my house of Indian cooking smells. Hmmm…no good. Maybe, I will after all settle for its more conventional use. Anybody have any foo powder?